Age is just a number for older adults
While more and more older adults are getting divorced, some are finding love again. Today we’re meeting a couple in their 90s that only got married last year, and another in their 70s that only tied the knot after almost 20 years together. What made them formalize their relationships? Let’s find out in our Weekly Feature.
Arms linked, this recently married couple, 92-year-old Mr. Chao and 91-year-old Ms. Yu take a walk and plan their date next week.
They met at Hsinchu Veterans Home in 2021 and married in March 2024.
Ms. Yu
I asked him if we should get married.
Mr. Chao
Although I did not say I was going to propose, she was already in my heart.
Mr. Chao became a resident at Hsinchu Veterans Home in 2021. His designated seat at the dining hall is right across from Ms. Yu. Their relationship blossomed over the three years they’ve shared a table.
Pai En-hui
Hsinchu Veterans Home manager
Ms. Yu is more gregarious. She asks lots of questions. They became friends later after they’ve gotten to know each other and participated in many activities at the veterans’ home together.
Mr. Chao came to Taiwan from Shanghai when he was only 16 years old. He said he’s had four relationships, but never got married. Ms. Yu, on the other hand, became widowed at a relatively young age. Both of them have been single for many years. Although Ms. Yu’s children are supportive of her relationship, the couple still worried what others may think when they were still dating.
Mr. Chao
We didn’t really hold hands in public then.
Ms. Yu
We only did after getting married. We’d go out for a walk after meals and get some air.
Mr. Chao
We’re also so old now. We worried that others may give us the side eye. It’s like we were breaking social norms, so we couldn’t be so public.
Hsu Hung-tao
Hsinchu Veterans Home pastor
Usually for the elders, if their spouse has passed away, they may think it’s enough to just be together and that there’s no need to get married. But their previous marriage has been nullified. I think it’s better for them to give their new partner legal status.
With the pastor’s encouragement, Ms. Yu decided to propose to Mr. Chao. In the summer of 2024, the seven-decade-old Hsinchu Veterans Home held its very first marriage ceremony.
The groom wore a grey suit, while the bride wore a pink lace dress and a white veil. They took vows before the pastor and promised to take care of each other for the rest of their lives.
Reporter
Have you seen her all dressed up like this before?
Mr. Chao
No. That’s why I always say she’s my queen.
Mr. Chao looks at the photo taken at their ceremony fondly.
Ms. Yu
Sometimes he’d want to kiss me, but I’d refuse and say it’s unsanitary.
Mr. Chao
She probably thinks I’m greedy.
As life expectancies rise amid medical advancements, there is a growing pool of single older adults. Some may have lost their spouses, like Ms. Yu; while others may have been single all their life. Where can they find love again?
A well-known matchmaking company in Taipei noticed as early as ten years ago that single adults beyond middle age are still interested in a relationship. The company has held many events for singles above the age of 50.
Ms. Ko (2015)
Participant
It’s been nine years since my husband passed away from colon cancer. I later found out it’s possible to find a new partner here, so I came here to see how things may go.
Ms. Yuan (2015)
Participant
My main goal is to make new friends and connections.
Juno Chu
Matchmaking company owner
When applications opened, I got more than 400 phone calls. The eldest person was 81 years old. On the day of the event he even suited up and drove here all the way from Yilan early in the morning.
Juno Chu, the owner of the matchmaking company said loneliness is the reason people joined the events, whether they’re long-term singles or widowed at middle age.
Juno Chu
Matchmaking company owner
Every participant tells me they’re really lonely. Their children may visit for a meal, but that’s it. By the sun sets they’d feel really down because there was no one to talk to. Actually, many chronic diseases are caused by feeling low. So the guy I just told you about, he had four chronic diseases. But after a few months with us, he told me he no longer had to take any medication because he felt so happy.
Chu believes dating at an advanced age has many benefits. Not only does it make people happier and healthier, older dates make for better partners thanks to their lived experiences.
Juno Chu
Matchmaking company owner
When the elders reach a certain age, their in-laws may no longer be here and their children are all grown up. So I think it’s the best time of one’s life, because one would’ve accumulated lots of life experience, and I think that removes many barriers.
That may be true on an individual level, but what about their children? Getting married again with adult children may lead to inheritance disputes in the future, which is not to be taken lightly.
Writer Kao Ai-lun is a respected figure in the media industry who spearheaded several news outlets in her career. She ended her first marriage at the age of 40. Little did she expect to fall in love again at 56, when she met her now-husband Wu Ting-nan, a retired military officer three years her senior. That was 17 years ago. They’ve only gotten married recently in their 70s. Before, they’ve never even considered it.
Wu Ting-nan
Married to Kao Ai-lun
We’ve been together for so many years. At this point it’s just a formality that’s really not so important for us. But being together for so long, I noticed how she’s always giving to people around her. But it seems like she’s not so concerned about protecting herself. So I thought it’d be better to formalize our relationship.
Kao and Wu got married to become each other’s legal inheritor, adding a greater sense of security to the relationship. People at their age may have amassed a certain level of wealth. How they plan to allocate their estate becomes a challenge to the relationship.
Kao Ai-lun
Writer
A parent would take care of these things and try to gift as much to their children as early as possible, to make the children feel secure. But then that causes the partner to feel that they’re not trusted. It’s inevitable that the partner feels threatened when you prioritize your own children. That’s why I think it’s best when both partners are equals financially speaking.
Issues involving money seem unspeakable in a relationship. With the rise of fraud and romance scams, news stories of victims abound. Many single older adults are thus less willing to let down their guards.
According to statistics, there were more than 1,300 cases of romance scams in 2024 alone. Many victims were older singles.
Juno Chu
Matchmaking company owner
There’s a guy who called me and said that a woman told him she’s giving him one day to decide whether to get a marriage registration, otherwise she’s no longer going to speak to him. I was on the phone with him for more than two hours. I told him not to rush marriage. Yes, young people are often impulsive, but so are older adults. It’s honestly astonishing how impulsive they can be sometimes, and we have to remind them to slow down.
Chu urges unmarried couples to really get to know their partners before tying the knot. She says it’s OK to believe in love at first sight, but do have a good idea of each other’s personal finance and health. Really knowing each other is key to a happy and lasting union.
We’re entering Mr. Chao and Ms. Yu’s new home. Decorations from the day of their marriage adorn the walls. It may not be a grand place, but it surely is well-kept and cozy.
Ms. Yu
The sweeping, mopping and cleaning are all done by him. He’d do laundry early in the morning when he wakes up. He does all the chores and he’s eager to do them.
The couple admits that it takes some time to get used to sharing a place after they’ve been on their own for so long. But they say even though they argue at times, they always reconcile the next day.
Ms. Yu
I think it’s great to take things one day at a time.
Mr. Chao
It’s great. I’ve never experienced this kind of life before. For me the marriage is a gift from her to me.
The couple’s story gives us a glimpse into old age as Taiwan’s population becomes even more aged. It shows us that single adults may not necessarily end up alone later in life. Love is possible at any stage of life.
For more Taiwan news, tune in:
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2025-06-20
